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Foghorn Langhorn

In fact, it's so remote, one wonders if the trip is worth the experience. The answer, of course, is a resounding affirmative! This week, we head back to Tom Sawyer Island!

What's that? We've already reviewed the loo on TSI? Well, that's true. Our long-time followers will recall one of our first Loo Reviews was of the restroom at the island's raft landing. Known as Tom's Landing, this loo site sits on the tip of this deceptively large island.

Today, however, we must journey deep into Tom Sawyer Island's heart. Taking the raft from Frontierland, we'll head past the landing area toward the island's lush interior. The path meanders, leading us to to another landing, this one belonging to Huck. Those who have visited the island before well-know this to be a great spot to take a break. The rocking chairs here -- situated in the shade -- afford their users a rare locale in Magic Kingdom perfect napping (taking a snooze to the delighted screams of Big Thunder Mountain riders is definitely a must-do that will never, ever be mentioned by Stacey -- ed).

Resisting the urge for a quick siesta, we forge onward, past Injun Joe's Cave and treading lightly over Superstition Bridge. We love this cool suspension bridge, by the way. It sort of "pops" into view as one rounds the bend. Crossing it affords us a great view of the aforementioned Big Thunder Mountain as well as an occasional glimpse of The Liberty Belle as she steams past. As much as we'd love to linger on the bridge for a spell, we need to keep moving (our bladders demand relief!). Fortunately, relief appears shortly after crossing the bridge. Fort Langhorn sits ahead!

Fort Langhorn (formerly Fort Sam Clemons -- renamed when Disney released 1996's Tom and Huck) is an honest-to-goodness fort, taking up most of Tom Sawyer Island's northern appendage. An overhead sign welcomes those who took the time to get here; and, make no mistake, it truly is a journey to get here. Rafts, hikes, bridges: this is not a trip for the feint of heart.

Of course, what fort would be complete without a loo or two? I mean, if we're going 15 minutes off the beaten Frontierland path to visit, the Dept. of Loo Imagineering would be crazy to not include a loo somewhere in the area. Let's look around, lest we be forced to find a suitable bush in which to seek relief.

The fort is large by WDW standards. Within its walls are plenty of walkways, lookouts, even a garrison of air rifles (to pick off those unruly BTM riders who refuse to remain seated with their hands, arms, feet, and legs inside the train). This is a cool place to get away from the sometimes overwhelming bustle of the park -- one truly feels transported completely out of Magic Kingdom while here.

Looking down toward the fort's interior from of the westside lookout towers, we happen to notice a small cabin below.

Could this be the object of our desire? Let's get closer.

At first glance, we find ourselves a little concerned. A public notice sign seems to indicate restrooms are located at the raft launch.

Peeking to the sign's right, however, we notice a small, covered spot that would seem to suggest otherwise:

To the left is a door leading to what we suspect is our loo, to the right are stairs leading to the famed Rifle Roost.

Yes! We've found it! Fort Langhorn is fully equipped to accommodate Buckaneers and Cowgirls alike. Sadly, there's no ADA restroom here (hence the afore-noted sign).

Here's the men's entrance:

Rustic, no?

And here's the ladies' "powder room" entrance:

She looks lovely, though don't count the tree rings. She'd be appalled if you knew her real age:

Let's look inside the men's loo!

Not much wiggle room here, folks! This little shack is large enough to hold a sink, a urinal and a toilet. The word "tiny" seems an overstatement. That said, it's a cozy little commode.

A view of a modern-looking sink -- fairly unexpected given the remoteness of this little loo. We expected to find more dated appointments out here in the backwoods of Tom Sawyer Island and were pleasantly surprised to note otherwise.

Look! Modern-looking basins in the frontier-era fort:

Now's a great time to point out that cool little accent strip running along the floor. Check out the river rock pattern here. It seems such a simple thing, but it adds a great deal of charm to a room that would otherwise seem too small to be charming.

Here's a closer look:

These rocks were clearly dredged from the Rivers of America specifically with this loo in mind.

Weary Fort Langhorn soldiers don't have the time or energy to spend effort flushing. There's a sensor here to do that for them. Again, modern accoutrements in a rustic building. WDW continues to surprise us when least expected!

One final look back toward the restroom's entrance before we depart:

We LOVE this loo. It's a hidden treasure for so many reasons. First, we'd venture to guess not many are aware of this loo's existence given it's tucked-away location. As mentioned earlier, it's quite a trek to get here. Only the most stalwart bladder can stem the flood during the 15 or so minute journey to get here from Frontierland. Most will go before they even take the raft to Tom Sawyer Island, while the remainder will use the Tom Sawyer Landing loo. Very few will make it within Fort Langhorn's walls before letting loose the tide. Given this, one can count on this being a quiet place to tend to nature's matters -- a rare thing indeed while at WDW!

Moreover, though small and remote, the loo is unexpectedly modern, comfortable, cozy! Its 1800's frontier fort disguise gives way to a 21st century loo with all the amenities!

One thing worth mentioning, though (thanks to Josiah Bisceglia of WDW Big Q Podcast fame for pointing this out): there is a down-side to the small loo. If more than one person needs to use the commode, what would otherwise be a leisurely trip to the restroom for the first person to sit down becomes a guilt-laden, rushed affair as the next person in line coughs and shuffles outside the stall. This is only an issue with small restrooms in general -- the large one's elsewhere on property do not burden their patrons with this problem. That said, we think it's a fair trade: solitude and exclusivity for the occasional intrusion.

WDW Loo Review Recap of Magic Kingdom's Tom Sawyer Island Fort Langhorn Loo:

Capacity: Mini (one urinal, one stall)

Cleanliness: Spotless

Theming: Unexpectedly modern yet rustic

Traffic: (crickets)

Changing Station: No

Companion Restroom: No

Access: Hope you don't have to go right now

OVERALL RATING: 4/5 urinal wafers

What a find! If you haven't sought out this loo, drop what you're doing and head there right now! As long as your solitude goes uninterrupted (which is very likely given this loo's remote location), you'll find Fort Langhorn offers an unparalleled evacuation experience! Seriously, folks, this loo ranks among the top 5 quietest places to poop on-property, and is well-worth the trip!

Thank you, as always, for taking the time to pay our little blog a visit. We'd love to hear your thoughts on this or any other loo we've reviewed. You -- loyal reader -- make our job worthwhile! Let us know what you think (oh, and don't forget to join us back here next week for another exclusive loo review)!!!

Until then, bottoms down and thumbs up, everyone!

Loo Review Matt

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