(Un)Loading Dock
Howdy folks! What a gift it is to see you here! Welcome back, and rest assured, we've got one humdinger of a loo review for you this week; but, before we get started, we're going to need a little help.
If you wouldn't mind, we'd like your assistance at Hollywood Studios. There's a few items we've shipped, arriving by freight, and we'll need some help at the loading dock. We've got a crate-full of triple-ply toilet paper, several boxes of industrial disposable strength toilet seat liners and a few Dyson air blades. This stuff is heavy, and moving it all is not to be tackled without enough hands on deck. We'll meet you at the loading dock.
What's that you say? What loading dock? Surely, you jest!?! Listen, you're the quintessential Disney fanatic, yes? You know everything there is to know about the parks and resorts, yes? You've found our blog and read it faithfully every week to assist you in finding the best places to poop on-property, yes? AND YOU DON'T KNOW WHERE TO FIND THE LOADING DOCK (amateurs! -- ed)?!
Shucks, don't beat yourself up. We bet you've seen the loading dock, even if you don't quite recall its location. Let's head there together.
After entering the park, we mosey Southwest along Hollywood Boulevard until we hit Sunset. Hanging a right, we head down Sunset Boulevard, the Hollywood Tower Hotel looming ominously in the distance. Don't get any ideas about taking the express elevator to the basement, though: we've got work to do!
Making our way North on Sunset, we'll head past the Planet Hollywood Superstore -- and then stop. To our right, there's a quaint alley in which our destination is firmly ensconsed. Blink, though, and you'll miss it. If we head past Sunset Club Couture, we've gone too far. Luckily, there's a sign situated on a lamp post to help keep us on task:
Thanks, helpful sign! We appreciate the assistance! Wait a second ... this sign suggests there may also be a restroom here. Come to think of it, that coffee we grabbed at The Trolley Car Cafe is starting to kick-in. We could use a pit stop. Heavy freight be damned, folks, it looks like we're heading to the loo! Welcome, one and all, to Disney's Hollywood Studios Sunset Boulevard Loading Dock Loo!
Let's take a glance down that alley:
This loo is located at the very back of the alley, elevated several feet from the street. Stairs get us to the platform on our left, a ramp does the trick to our right. At the top, a squat wall with glass block windows affords the dock workers some privacy as they head to their respective restrooms: women's to the left, men's to the right.
Before we head to the loo, though, let's soak up some of the local sights! Check out this faux accordion door beneath the loading dock sign!
Just beyond the loading door is the back-alley, shipping/receiving entrance to LA Cinema Storage. Rumor has it this is where they keep the equipment to edit Steven Tyler's hand.
On the alley's opposite side, we see the world headquarters for Desert Hot Springs Ice Company, which always does a brisk business at DHS.
Moving through the archway at the alley's end and closer to the restrooms, we see more stage equipment, a telephone bank and the ever-helpful Automatic External Defibrillator.
A well worn alley lamp lights the way for the after-hours dock employees as they weave their way through freight boxes en route to the loo:
A concrete wall and plain sign marks our destination (hey, when you're working the dock, there's no need to fancify things -- ed):
Let's head on in, yes?
Holy cow! It's the famed Hollywood Tile of Terror! Readers of our blog know all about this pattern that we love to hate to love. It's a sea of seizure-inducing blue, purple and yellow that can be found in many of the loos near the front of this park. Once seen, the Hollywood Tile of Terror (HTOT) can ne're be forgotten. It's like staring at the sun, then closing your eyes and yet still seeing the solar flare: the HTOT remains permanently emblazoned on the retina.
Don't believe me? Here, take a closer look:
We did a whole write-up on this tile in April. You can check it out right HERE!
Here's a look back toward the loo's entrance from deeper inside. There are a total of 5 urinals, including one of those strange ones that looks like someone couldn't decide if they wanted a toilet or a urinal, instead creating a weird hybrid (see right in the photo below). Seriously folks: what's the story with these Frankenstein's monster urinals? We've seen small children mistake these for toilets, backing up and sitting on them (actually, IN them -- the thing has no seat, so there's an inevitable cold water buttock dip that occurs when someone tries to sit). Also, note the mirror next to this hybrid urinal, affording the user the opportunity to admire himself while pooping ... in.the.urinal.
Four sinks, including one for Junior, ensure there' s plenty of elbow room for maintenance of hand hygiene. This photo features the accent strip of tile that runs near the ceiling throughout this loo. It's a variation on the Tile of Terror floor -- similar colors sans the yellow.
The walls in this loo are an uninspiring cream color. The counter is an uninspiring brown. This by no means implies that restroom walls and countertops must inspire their users (but it is kind of nice when they do -- ed). The sinks here are automatic, the soap dispensers, not so much.
There are three stalls in the loading dock loo. Unfortunately, none are of the ADA compliant variety. Notice just how similar this commode is to the aforementioned freaky urinal. There's just enough room in here for the essentials: toilet, toilet seat liner dispenser and two Sam's Club-sized toilet paper roll holders. Oh, and more vertigo-inducing Hollywood Tile of Terror beneath the feet.
Heerrrreee's Baby! The countertop here matches that of the sinks. More importantly, the station is recessed in the wall such that babies will not be frightened by the tile pattern on the floor.
As we leave the loading dock loo, male users can catch a glimpse of the women's loo across the way. Wave "Hi" to Push, by the way (he's situated in the lower left of the photo -- ed).
WDW Loo Review Recap of Disney Hollywood Studios' Loading Dock Loo:
Capacity: Medium (5 urinals, 3 stalls -- 0 ADA compliant)
Cleanliness: Spotless
Theming: Back Alley Loading Dock/Tile of Terror Extravaganza
Traffic: Busy
Changing Station: Yes
Companion Restroom: No
Access: Easy (though blink, and you'll miss it if you're heading down the Boulevard with your eyes on the Hollywood Tower Hotel)
OVERALL RATING: 3.5/5 urinal wafers
This loo has a great location, fantastic exterior theming and, well, not so much going on inside. We'd give it a lower score were it not for the kitschy, cringe-worthy and oh-so-beloved Hollywood Tile of Terror within. The loo has the potential to be so much more if the exterior theme were carried over inside. That said, it's easily accessible and clean -- so the basics are well-covered. There are more worthy loos at DHS, but this one is worth a stop if you're in the neighborhood and need to go.
Thank you, as always, for stopping by the blog and spending a few minutes with us. We hope you continue to enjoy our work! Please, let us know if there's anything we can do better or if you have any loo review requests! We aim to please (no pun intended ... well, maybe a little).
Have a wonderful week, friends! Until our next review: bottoms down and thumbs up!
Matt