A Whole New World
Well, hey you! It's been a long time, stranger! Seriously, we've missed your visits to the blog! What's that? Lack of content? By George, you're right! We have had a lack of new content of late, and we're so sorry! Let us here at WDW Loo Review make it up to you by featuring one of the newest loos on property, one that's truly out of this world! Not only that, this review is part one of a two-part review-a-ganza!
We'll get started here in a moment, but, we want to take a second to remind you that, even if there's a dry spell in new content, we've got an extensive archive featuring your most favorite places to leave a deposit on property! From the TTC to the TTA, restaurants to resorts, Tomorrowland to Futureworld -- we've got all the potties covered! So, be sure to stop by and revisit some fantastic memories of your previous trips to WDW. The door is always open!
Oh, and lastly (and, as always), thank you for taking the time to visit our site. We love that you love everything about Disney Parks and Resorts, and we hope you find a scintilla of nostalgia each time you visit the blog!
Alright, enough formalities: we've got a loo to review!
As we're sure you're aware, Animal Kingdom's newest land is literally a galaxy apart from lands existing and prior in the park. Asia, Africa and even Dinoland U.S.A., though exotic, don't hold a candle to Joe Rohde and team's latest creation. Of course, we're talking about Pandora's Valley of Mo'ara! What an amazing location: Disney has truly upped its game here, immersing visitors in another world! That said, what about the restrooms here? Do they live up to the same standard?
This is the first of a two-part review, each part featuring one of Pandora's two restrooms. Next time, we'll make a pit-stop just outside of Alpha Centauri Expedition's Satu'li Canteen for a deep dive into the former Resources Development Administration's loos! This time, however ....
... we're visiting the Pandora Eastside Loo! What, you can't see it? I assure you, the restroom is in the above photo, though, admittedly, it's cleverly disguised to blend into the landscape (it's also hidden by hordes of park guests). Take a gander to the right of the photo: looking carefully, you'll see a structure with an almost cave mouth-like opening. That's the Pandora Eastside Loo!
How to get here? Well, first you must cross the Moa'ra Magical Bridge of Too Many People:
Then, heading past the nightmarish Pandoran Audrificous Dos Plant (feed me, Seymour! -- ed):
Shortly after moving past this monstrous piece of vegetation, we encounter a fork in the path. Turning right takes us to Flight of Passage and Satu'li Canteen, whilst staying left keeps us on target (Stay on Target! -- Woah, we just crossed the Sci-Fi streams there -- sincere apologies).
Ah, here's a sign, though, given the lack of integration into the landscape, we suspect its placement here was an afterthought after too many folks got lost in Mo'ara.
Pandora was designed with the intention of truly immersing guests. Signage is kept at a minimum, and the overall impression is one of entering a lush valley, previously colonized by the RDA and now slowly being overtaken again by nature itself. The effect is amazing, yet it can be a little hard to navigate to the new visitor, which is also intentional. Guests are encouraged to simply wander and find their own way: and, while we here at the WDW Loo Review home offices can appreciate that design, we also understand that, sometimes, when nature calls, there's just not time to meander. Given this, let's forge ahead!
Moving onward, we finally see the Eastside Loo to our left. As stated above, it's a well-hidden structure, a former remnant of the nefarious Resource Development Administration, now rapidly being consumed by Mo'ara's flora. A light post marks our final destination:
Look at this!
At first glance, this looks like an old concrete bunker. In fact, one might be tempted to harshly judge Imagineering for throwing together a junky, run-down, ill-designed restroom (au contraire mon frère!).
Recall, Pandora opened just a few months ago, yet this loo looks like it's been neglected for decades. Clearly, a lot of thought went into designing this loo's exterior to make it look as though the facility has suffered 30 years of disrepair. So, if the overall initial impression of the exterior is, "Gross. This place is a dump!", we all need to stop and give Joe Rohde and team some major props: goal achieved, Imagineering!
Let's check out some of the exterior details!
The metal frame steps here are sagging, the pipes rusting. Look at the concrete edges of this building: they're uneven, cracked, showing signs of wear and tear. The paint on the concrete walls (which indicates this was previously an RDA Decon Facility) is fading away, while the local flora continues to secure its foothold on the structure.
Here's another look at the concrete exterior walls which demonstrate the awesome power of Mo'ara's vegetation, slowly reclaiming this derelict bunker. Moss, fungi and all sorts of alien plant species are taking over.
Painstaking work even went into designing exterior lighting. Check out the faux-roots which are taking hold of this overhead lamp! Amazing work!
This sign serves two purposes: first, it fills-in the story of this structure's history (it served as a decontamination facility); and, second, it cleverly disguises an emergency phone and AED. We love this!
Here's a glance at the women's and companion loo exterior doors. Both rusted and worn, surrounded by pock-marked concrete.
The women's loo sign:
And, the companion loo sign:
Finally, that of the men's restroom:
Notice how all signs are new and not at all worn (which is in sharp contrast to the rest of the building's exterior). This is intentional -- ACE (Alpha Centauri Expeditions) has recently repurposed this decon facility for use as restrooms. The signs, therefore, have not been subject to 30 years of wear and tear. This, friends, is taking theming to a new level! The fact that someone in a backroom somewhere thought, "Now, let's see here: the building is old, but we've got to make the signs look new." -- well, let's just say our minds are blown by the level of exterior detail here and the amount of contemplation that must've been required to execute it.
Here's the door to the custodial equipment (That's right! See! Securely locked! Access denied!):
Alright, enough of the outside, we need to start moving inside. Will this loo's interior live up to the expectations set forth by the exterior? We've got our opinion, but let's take a look together so you can form your own, yes?
Here's a peek into the men's loo from the entrance:
It's a thoroughly modern loo: masculine, clean, very nice, not at all worn (we like the term "snazzy" to describe this one, not sure why -- ed). There are 5 stalls here, including one ADA-compliant one, each cordoned-off by patterned-grey walls and doors.
Sinks in abundance! A cream-colored counter surrounds four off-white basins, all of which sits in stark contrast to a brown-and-grey tiled adjacent wall. This photo illustrates all of the colors seen in this loo: mostly shades of brown and slate.
Looking into one of the stalls, we get a closer gander at the large, weathered brown tiles/plates which adorn some of this loo's walls. Each is adorned with industrial-looking metal screws. This is a pretty cool effect.
Beneath our feet is faux hardwood tile. This seems to be a favorite of the Department of Loo Imagineering, as it's found in most of the new restrooms on property (New Fantasyland, Norway Pavilion, etc).
Five urinals (four tall boys and one shorty) line one of the walls here. Nothing too special to note about these basins, though the photo illustrates one cool aspect of this loo: the metal-esque trim near the ceiling. There is a ~ 2 foot wide strip of unique-looking, textured tile which runs near the ceiling throughout this loo. It is further illuminated by recessed lighting along the wall, and the overall glow effect is pretty neat.
A closer look demonstrates this is merely tile, but the pattern is nonetheless eye-catching:
The infant changing station here is warm and modern, just like the rest of the loo. Most babies would, in our most humble opinion, enjoy a diaper change here.
And, finally, here's a look into the companion loo. In typical Disney fashion, there's abundant room for an entire family here.
WDW LOO REVIEW RECAP OF ANIMAL KINGDOM'S EASTSIDE PANDORA (DECON FACILITY) LOO:
Capacity: Medium. There are only two restrooms in Pandora's Mo'ara Valley, somewhat surprising given the crowds here.
Cleanliness: Mostly clean on the day of our visit
Theming: Exterior theming is excellent. We'll discuss the interior theming later. Suffice it to say, it's a clean, thoroughly modern loo.
Changing Station: Yes!
Companion Loo: You betcha!
Access: Easy, though the loo is cleverly disguised and intentionally hidden among foliage. Look for the signs, and you should be able to find it.
Overall Rating: 3/5 Urinal Wafers
There's a lot to love here at the Eastside Pandora Loo: the exterior theming is truly next-level. You could spend 30 minutes combing the outside of this restroom for details and still miss so many things. The interior, well, it's modern and clean, but, upon stepping inside, we're not convinced we're still in Pandora anymore. We'll have a lot more to say about this in Part 2 of our Pandora Loo Review, but, if you'd like a preview of our thoughts, we'll refer to our post-D23 letter to Bob Chapek: click here for a read.
Hey, thank you for joining us for another review, and don't forget to check back soon for the second part of our Pandora Loo extravaganza! If you'd like to be notified when our new reviews are published, be sure to go to our website and subscribe! You'll get an email notification each time a new review is unleashed (and, don't worry, your email is not released to any third parties and we do not try to sell you anything -- it's a completely non-toxic subscription). Also, be sure to toss us a "like" on Facebook and follow us on both Instagram and Twitter! We appreciate your support!
Until next time, friends: bottoms down and thumbs up!
Loo Review Matt