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The Great Muppet Crapper

Wow! Has it really been over a month since our last review? How time flies! Fear not, intrepid loo explorer, we've got a great one in store for you this time.

You may recall our visit to Gonzo's Royal Flush in Disney's Hollywood Studios back in late 2016. This was shortly after our beloved Streets of America were barricaded and the DHS Back Lot became persona non backlotta. The newly revised backside of Disney's Hollywood Studios was comprised solely of Gonzo's Royal Flush, Muppet Vision 3-D and a couple of gift shops. You'll recall even Pizza Planet was shuttered with the promise of a new, well-themed restaurant to come.

Gonzo's Royal Flush Exterior

Fast forward 18 months: we're nearly one year away from Star Wars: Galaxy's Edge and we have Pizza Planet's worthy replacement -- Pizzerizzo -- as a place to congregate and dine.

Say what you want about the pizza here (there's no middle ground -- either folks love the slices or hate them), it's a cool place to hang. There's ample seating on the ground floor and an extra cool upstairs area with a covered outdoor terrace for people watching. Personally, we love to sit up here and watch the Star Wars fans walk up to that big wall and stare at it longingly, shedding tears of anticipation.

What's that you say? What about the restrooms? Fortunately, Pizzerizzo has them in abundance!

Gonzo's Royal Flush has a well-themed exterior facade which connects, at its back end, to Pizzerizzo's first floor interior. This affords those guests who place their order and choose stay with their feet planted on terra firma plenty of stalls and urinals from which to choose.

That said, we highly encourage all to brave the short flight of backlit stairs to Pizzerizzo's second floor -- this is where the all the magic happens (and, we swear, the pizza tastes better up here). The second story of Pizzerizzo is themed in such abundance, it will take multiple trips to catch all the inside jokes, nods to famous Muppets and corny puns.

And, yes, friends, there is a loo up here!

Before we get to the restroom, though, let's check out Pizzerizzo's top floor.

Booths and tables are sparsely scattered up here, while the walls are dense with all kinds of detail! Check out Statler and Waldorf hanging out near The Brooklyn Bridge:

Statler and Waldorf and the Brooklyn Bridge

Here's the senior citizen hecklers again, this time crashing a circa-1960 wedding reception:

Lew Zealand proffering his services on an upstairs corkboard:

Lew Zealand Ad at Pizzerizzo

Here's everyone's favorite stand-up bear, advertising his art for weddings and funerals (notice the reference to Rizzo's Deluxe Supreme Banquet Hall -- we'll get to that in a second):

There are too many pieces to feature in this review, but all are funny and worth the trip to Pizzerizzo alone.

On the second floor's far end, there's another room, separated from the main dining area by a brick wall with two arched entryways. Posted on the wall between the arches, we see the schedule for the banquet hall beyond:

We love this reference to The Muppets Take Manhattan!

And check out Rizzo's Deluxe Supreme Banquet Hall! This is -- next to the loo, of course -- this restaurant's coolest feature.

Colored lights blink and disco balls turn to illuminate the dance floor below while chandeliers and mauve tapestries decorate the ceiling above, while the greatest wedding party hits of the 70's and 80's are (Chicken Dance, anyone? -- ed) piped-in through myriad speakers. Friends, this is the epitome of every wedding reception from 1975 to 1989. The kids won't get it, but mom and dad will feel like they're traveling back to a time when mullets were king and the ozone layer was being consumed by hairspray. This area is awesome.

Alas, we must leave getting down behind and get down to the business of taking care of nature's business. On the end opposite Rizzo's banquet hall, we see another brick wall, this one adorned with caricatures of our favorite muppets.

Let's move in for a closer look.

Guy Smiley at your service!

Bobby Flay ain't got nothing on everyone's favorite Swedish Chef:

Sandwiched between an illuminated condiment station on the right and the wall of caricatures on the left, we see our destination:

Here, beneath a bricked arch, sits Pizzerizzo's second floor loo!!!

Note, the women's loo was being cleaned at the time we shot our photos; hence, the presence of a cleaning cart parked in the loo foyer, just beyond the arch. Not to worry, folks: you typically won't need to navigate around this stainless steel monstrosity to enter the restrooms here.

We love the doors leading to the restrooms: a frosted chicken-wire glass window sits within a heavy door. It's a vintage look and reminds us of the door one would see leading to an office in a police department (Barney Miller, anyone?).

The door to the men's room:

As you'll soon see, the genius of this restroom's theme is a well-designed look of 1970's, industrial grunge. These loos are meant to feel at home in a NYC banquet hall from a bygone era, maintained in a state of disrepair (as rat-owners are often wont to do).

Just look at this sign! Though it's only a little over one year old, it appears to be much older, coated in grime (it's not), worn -- even the screws are faux-rusted! Somebody thought of that, and someone believed it!

Lest the ladies feel left-out ....

Stepping inside we see a comfortable, clean loo. The design is 1970's NYC industrial chic, which well fits with the theme of Pizzerizzo's second floor.

Subway tile abounds here. Best viewed above the sink station, the tile looks worn, but is clean, simple, with but a thin strip of maroon separating the brown countertop from a wall of off-white. Sconces illuminate the single basin from above, bathing the room in a golden glow.

And, yes, opposite the sink, you see this loo's small baby-changing station. Simple, clean and compact -- just like the rest of this loo.

Here's a closer look at the wall sconces:

An unassuming floor squats below. The plain look jives well with this loo, which manages to look cool simply by resting on its retro laurels.

Peeking into the restroom's ADA stall (one of only two stalls up here), we see how the maroom/white subway tile theme is carried throughout the space. There's not a wall that doesn't use this pattern. It's boring, but it works in a restroom themed to a decades old Brooklyn banquet hall.

By the way, we don't know whose elbow that is in the loo vanity mirror, there, but it sure is a sexy one (Don't flatter yourself. I've seen sexier elbows on bathroom pipes -- ed).

Take a closer look at the wall here -- especially the maroon wainscoting. It looks (intentionally) dingy and worn. Folks, this is a prime example of the subtle theming that makes WDW so special. From the restroom signs, to the choice of vanity lights, to the worn tile: someone took great pains to ensure the theme of a rat-owned-and-operated banquet venue from 1970's NYC carried over into the loo's interior. Bravo!

This sign looks like it needs a good dose of C.L.R. Faux-filth for the win!

As we prepare to vacate the premises, we pause to soak in one last detail. Even the waste bins here have that "Rizzo touch". Folks, say what you may about the food offerings here, all can at least agree Pizzerizzo's second floor is painstakingly themed, even down to the loos.


Capacity: Small

Cleanliness: Exceptionally clean (though this loo is themed to appear otherwise)

Theming: Rat-Decorated, Rat-Approved NYC Grime

Companion Loo: No

Access: Can only be visited by walking up Pizzerizzo's single flight of stairs

WDW Loo Review Score: 4/5 Urinal Wafers

We'll be honest: at first glance, this loo didn't seem like much, especially in the context of the heavily-themed exterior of Pizzerizzo's second floor. That said, once we started paying attention to the little details (and there's a lot of them here), it didn't take long to realize the genius of this loo. Trust us, this one is well-worth the trip upstairs. Spend about 10 minutes exploring the restaurant, then tip your hat to Rizzo by visiting his upstairs facilities.

Until next time, friends: bottoms down and thumbs up!

--Loo Review Matt

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